When the 'what ifs' are a good thing.
It's so interesting being a coach....
Every trigger I feel, every challenging emotion or situation, I'm pulling out my magnifying glass, my microscope, my beakers and burners, and seeing what kind of alchemical shift needs to take place.
That doesn't mean I don't feel them, or freak out, or need to get in child's pose on the living room rug and cry my eyes out.
I do.
But more and more and more quickly, I'm able to look underneath, poke the layer of me that's coming up to be seen, and find a new way to look at it.
One of those happened today, and at first I went to the communication tools I teach.
I expressed how I was feeling, why I was upset, spoke my truth, claimed my needs.
And this person heard me, but I still felt struggle.
So then I looked at the trigger:
I was feeling judged for how a part of my life looked to someone else.
So, wait, if I'm feeling triggered by this --- then that means *I* believe this about myself. So that means I think that this part of my life is sub-par; that it's not good enough; that there's something inherently wrong with it...
And for a minute, I went down the Masculine energy road of, "Okay, how can I work on this part of my life? How can I fix this with the tools at my disposal?"
But then do you know what happened?
I stopped.
And I embraced my Goddess energy. My Feminine flow.
And I realized --- what if it's OKAY that this part of my life is different from others versions of their lives?
What if this doesn't actually have to look like other people think it should?
What if it's perfect in its imperfectness?
What if it's SUPPOSED to look this way, in support of my highest good and my best life?
Coming back to this center, I felt a sense of relief.
I can put down this other person's judgment because *I* no longer have to judge this part of me.
And when I no longer judge this part of me, I don't have to feel triggered, unhappy, less than, not good enough --- even if I'm still judged by someone else.
I can still make changes --- I can still choose to approach this part of my life differently, to be aware of what might feel even better than it does now and to consciously co-create the BEST version of my life ---
--- but it doesn't have to be for anyone else, or to fit anyone else's idea of "right."