Today my entire day got derailed. And I let it.
Two assholes killing elephants for sport totally derailed my entire day.
I only had one call today — She Wolf, call II — but I had plans after that for a bunch of things;
planning the next podcast;
updating the content for the next Golden Goddess call;
finishing the content for the Connect Me: Activate Your Intuitive Channel mini-course...
...and I did none of it.
Because I saw an article — and images — of two awful, smug assholes beaming with pride, standing next to the dead bodies of adult and BABY elephants... plural... that they shot and killed. For fun.
So I couldn't do any of it.
I sobbed.
I curled up with my cat on the love seat in my office.
I sobbed on my mat some more.
I tried to journal and connect with my Cosmic Team — but I'm so heavy and dark with a visceral emotional pain I can't even begin to describe to you,
that I couldn't really 'hear' anything.
I'm still sitting here,
heavy,
swollen eyes,
not feeling like I can get this 'work' done tonight,
not feeling like I can offer anything to anyone for the moment.
For some people, this may seem like a wasted day.
For others, it may even seem like an emotional over-indulgence — and those folk may think I should have just bucked up and gotten on with it, gotten back to the task, gotten back to work.
But they would miss the mark.
And they'd be missing out on one of the most beautiful
(albeit uncomfortable)
parts of the process of our Expansion:
The willingness to be with the energetic and emotional Ebbs as much as we're willing to be with the Flows.
To be with the dark as much as we gladly are willing to be with the light.
To soften to pain as much as we want to just make it stop.
Because every time we get out of our own Human, monkey-mind, "stick to the plan and the straight lines" way,
and ALLOW what wants to move through us,
even if we don't entirely understand it,
to move through us;
allow ourselves to be moved,
to be stilled,
to be silenced ---
— we are that much more in-tune with the Voice of our Soul, the calling of our Wild Power, the subtleties of our greatest Knowing and deepest Quantum Realms of our Intuition.
What do most of us do?
Stuff it down.
Push it aside.
Pack it away somewhere so we can get back to work,
or so we don't look "so emotional."
Or we let our Anger take over for the deeper emotion,
so we conveniently never have to feel it.
If we're pushing away one part of our Channel —
emotion, sensation, intuition, Pleasure, stillness, Intimacy, or any number of other ways we stifle our full Feminine Channel
— then we're stifling everything else
that wants to reach us.
When I've moved through times like these in the past, for other reasons?
Allowing myself to soften against what I really don't want to be feeling, allowing myself to turn off the expectations of the "plan" and the To Do list — and let myself be in deep Surrender to the energy that wants to move through me?
My Intuition clicks up a notch.
My business booms even bigger.
The downloads come flooding in.
Another Wound Pattern peels away.
I'm upleveled.
Because if you're not willing to be with the intense energy of something like this wanting to move through you —
— how can you be with the greater intensity of the energy that you're wishing would come to you?
▽
xoxo
PS — to Activate this ancient, forgotten Archetype within you, and learn how to have the Love, Life and Magic you’re meant for — download your free Goddess Manifesto and audio invocation here. www.heather-allison.com/goddessing1
Heather Allison is a Goddess Coach, Divine Feminine Channel and an accidental Cosmic Shaman. She was plucked out of a 'almost life' by what she calls her Cosmic Team to help women Awaken the Goddess Within and find the Love, Soul, Pleasure and Purpose they're meant for.
As a Feminine energy coach, love coach, life coach, soul coach, teacher, photographer, author and the founder of Goddess Army --- the women's journey of Awakening and Remembering our Divine Feminine magic --- she works with coaches, healers, light workers and all soulful women who know they're meant for MORE. Her passion is helping women awaken and embody their Inner Goddess archetype, and shift out of the paradigm of suffering and struggle, to find their Mythic Love and Life. Based in Seattle, she works with goddess worldwide.